Thursday, September 6, 2007
We all experience some stress in our lives every day, but if you find yourself worrying so much that you're losing sleep and having a hard time concentrating at work, then it is time you took action. Worry and fear are powerful emotions, and if left untreated they can often lead to anxiety and even depression.
The first thing to remember is that just as a seed cannot grow without soil and water to nourish it, your anxiety cannot grow without you feeding it. Anxiety is caused by an intense fear or worry about a possible outcome. These are the thoughts that are running unchecked through your head. The only way to control your anxiety is by controlling your thoughts.
You can begin by thinking back to other times when you worried about something. Did the fear come true or was the worry groundless? How much time have you wasted agonizing over something that never came about? It's okay to have a little anxiety, everyone does. It's when the worry begins to control your life that it has become a serious problem.
Worry has never solved anything. Because worry is a form of fear and intense fear can paralyze us, anxiety can actually make us fear making a decision and prevents us from solving the problem. Instead, we just keep running the same negative possible outcome over and over through our heads. Our fear actually creates additional fear.
If there is something wrong, then you need to focus on fixing it instead of worrying about it. If it can't be fixed, then worrying about what might happen tomorrow accomplishes nothing except spoiling today. Worry on its own has never fixed anything.
Anxiety can become a vicious cycle that feeds itself. The only way to overcome the anxiety is to overcome the fear, and this is accomplished by changing your thought process. Rather than having a mind full of fear, fill it with hope and favorable outcomes. Events seldom turn out as terrible or as wonderful as we imagine they will. Our thoughts tend to the extreme while life is usually somewhere in the middle.
Concentrate on the positives and when you feel any negativity creeping into your thought process, push it away and go back to the positives. It is like a tug-of-war, either you control your anxiety or your anxiety will control you. Start with small issues and work your way up to larger ones, always picturing a positive outcome. Once you can keep these positive results in mind, you then need to begin taking positive action to make them come about. The cure for anxiety begins as a thought and then works its way into a positive action.
If you are carrying around a lot of worries, you need to either let some of them go or get yourself bigger shoulders.
Gary Mosher is co-author of the award-winning 'Buddha in the Boardroom', the book that shows you how to excel in today's chaotic and stressful workplace environment, available from Bodhi Tree Publishing, LLC
How To Indirectly Influence A Persons Behaviour
How To Indirectly Influence A Persons Behaviour--Michael HallIs it really possible to influence a persons behavior andcause that person to react to your persuasion withoutcausing upset and without using force or shouting or byinvoking fear of pain or loss?Of course it is possible, let's start with a real lifeexample ...---Look mommy, look! I ate all my Ravioli ...Wow! Look honey, your big boy ate all of his Ravioli, nowisn't he a smart boy? I think this smart boy deserves afreezer pop.See daddy? Look. I ate all my Ravioli.Wow, would you look at that, what a smart boy.---Now the concept ...A book I read explained a concept of how to get people todo what you want them to do without them getting upset withyou in the process. One of the many techniques explainedinvolves giving the person a motive without exposing yourmotive.The example above shows the concept in action on our threeyear old son. Our motive or desire was to have him eat hisfood instead of playing with it. We knew that he wants usto praise him and call him 'smart boy' and 'big boy'.So we decided we would react in a wild fit of praise whenhe ate most or all of food and then give him a freezer popas a reward. After a few tries, he now eats all of his foodand shows of his empty plate, we in turn praise him andsometimes we reward him with a freezer pop or candy.Whether he is given a phsycal reward or not he still eatsall his food and expects praise. We both win and we don'thave to resort to spanking or shouting, he willingly doeswhat we want him to do.If me or my wife eat all of our food, he will often blurtout, "that's a smart daddy" or "that's a big girl" orsomething to that effect and sometimes tell the otherparent to get the freezer pops or ice cream.---Now you try it ...What would you like your spouse, co-worker, friend,business partner, etc to do? First find out what they wouldlike and then use that as an incentive to motivate orpersuade them to do what you want ... try suggestinginstead of asking or telling.Almost all people respond to praise, promotion, money,security or love. Just use the right incentive with alittle tactful suggestion and you can almost control thesubject. Of course you should use integrity and not try toconvince a person to do anything wrong and/or immoral.____________________________________________________________Learn the other techniques by investing in a copy "How ToWin Friends and Influence People",http://www.urllog.com/bsmbahamas/influence and why notjoin my free newsletter "Miracles Of Words" for more greatarticles on the subject of wealth, success and motivation?http://www.urllog.com/bsmbahamas/miracles
What it Means to be Simple
WHAT IT MEANS TO BE SIMPLE by David BrewsterI've never been so insulted. All I wanted was some reassurancethat the path I have chosen - the pursuit of simplicity in theworkplace - was a valid and noble one. And what did I get back?A tirade the likes of which I haven't experienced in the threeyears, as it is now, that I have been promoting this cause.The vilification was started by a companion I have had for over20 years. I asked my old friend to tell me what it means to besimple. "Weak in intellect," came the reply, bluntly."Unworldly, unsophisticated; feeble-minded, ignorant,uneducated."Stunned, I decided that my Concise Oxford Dictionary must havebecome sullen and stodgy in its old age. I sought support fromsomeone a bit younger. The Macquarie Dictionary shares myAustralian heritage; surely it might be more encouraging. Andinitially it seemed to be more diplomatic, at least."Unassuming, unpretentious, sincere and true," it said.But then my local mate seemed to take sides with its Englishcounterpart. "Lacking mental acuteness or sense," it went on."Not highly developed; lowly, insignificant, trifling; devoid ofsubtlety," (which, I could hear Oxford thinking, was a bit richcoming from an Australian).My Thesaurus was no more courteous. I've known Roget for yearsbut, alas, his view of simplicity wasn't any nicer: "Foolish,artless, plebeian." He did start to give me some hope when helater came back with 'home-spun', though this hardly bolsteredthe role of simplicity in business.Perhaps, I thought, technology might be my friend.Unfortunately, the internet dictionaries simply chose adifferent form of abuse. They aligned simplicity with words Ifound less than simple to understand: prosaic, not abstruse orenigmatical, not sagacious, not given to artifice.At this point, somewhat jaded, I took some time out. I wonderedhow a word as apparently simple as 'simple' could bring on suchan onslaught of invective. Especially when, in its every dayuse, simplicity usually carries with it a very positive image.It is increasingly becoming a favourite of advertisers, so theremust be a positive spin there somewhere.Later, while saying goodnight to my kids, I noticed my elderdaughter's lexical friend: 'My First Macquarie Dictionary'. Now,my daughter only hangs out with pleasant people (or so Ibelieve) so surely here I might find some stronger support forsimplicity. And sure enough, there it was.SIMPLE (adj.): easy to understand, do or use.Here, at last, was the endorsement I was looking for. Whatcould be nobler - or ultimately more beneficial for everyoneinvolved - than making an organisation easier to understand, itswork easier to do and its products or services easier to use?Not much, in my view - and I hope you agree.---------David Brewster specialises in helping managers who are struggling toget the most out of themselves and their people. He helps managerssucceed by finding ways to simplify the way they work, the productsthey create and the way they communicate. David is a professionalspeaker, trainer, advisor and coach. More information along withfree downloads and resources are available at his website:http://www.businesssimplification.com.au
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